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Our advice: Be careful out there -- there is always a catch.

ARISTO GERMAN MALE Daddy was the Kaiser’s favorite nephew. It’s just a shame Germany got rid of their royals in 1918.

Aristo German Male may even initially encourage your fantasies. You will be forced to eat Leberwurst, meet his 100-year-old granny and walk the family gun dogs -- who, sensing that you’re not really posh, will bite you.

If you really want to go out with one: Lose weight and get used to Saturday nights drinking orange juice. Has a facial expression not dissimilar to a spaniel that has been beaten up one too many times.

NEEDY GERMAN MALE: Usually in his mid-to-late twenties, the needy German male has generally just been dumped by his first girlfriend with whom he had been together since he hit puberty. Then he realizes the solution: He needs a replacement girlfriend. Habitat: Needy German male is probably still studying and light years away from getting a proper job (Germans can stretch their university degree courses over a decade).

Aristo German Male style almost always includes a Thomas Pink shirt, designer jeans and tweed jacket.

Keep an eye out for a tendency to shop at “Frankonia Jagd” or similar huntin’-shootin’-fishin’ establishments.

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