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When his department chair told him to stop running up the phone bill, and his girlfriend told him to move out, he got sick.

He had a disease exacerbated by stress he’d never mentioned during two weeks of real-life sweet nothings and two months of love letters and phone conversation.

I grew up in a town known for hunting, fishing, bars, strip joints—even a house of ill repute, until it burned to the ground when, according to town gossip, a prostitute tried to make a grilled sandwich on a steam iron.

It was like the setting for “The Postman Always Rings Twice,” only not suspenseful.

If someone at work asked me about my weekend, I smiled silently too. Buying a house in the woods and dating men who lived in the woods was no doubt a way of alleviating impostor syndrome, chronic worries I’d forget which Shakespeare play I’d just quoted, or that I’d be forced to say a word or phrase I’d read but never heard: "fin de siècle" or "deus ex machina" or "ribald."Then I met a man at a conference who’d studied Latin at top-tier schools. He liked that I was wisecracking and “sexually unapologetic.” He went home and told his girlfriend he loved me, then called daily. To bring you the best content on our sites and applications, Meredith partners with third party advertisers to serve digital ads, including personalized digital ads.Those advertisers use tracking technologies to collect information about your activity on our sites and applications and across the Internet and your other apps and devices.Every woman I know in San Francisco says the same thing.“He has to be this much taller and make this much more money. No date is dinged for being 5’5” or pursuing a career as a yogini.”Charles was right.I mean, I’m tall and successful, so he should be MORE tall and successful. As long as a woman is kind, cute and brushes her teeth, she is considered eligible.

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He broke up with me as he’d loved me, long-distance. I heated my house with a woodstove, so I explained that fresh-cut wood is green and must season.

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